And as I don't want this to remain just a reflection, today I wanted to share something practical: a kind of advice log (which nobody asked me for, I know), but which has been very useful for me to make a change in the midst of a world that seems to go at 130 km/h without ever slowing down.
Will you join me?
This is my list of rituals. I invite you to start exploring yours and keep it handy as a little "memory aid" (or a post-it like the ones you stick on the fridge so you don't forget) for those moments when you feel you've gone off the deep end and need a lifeline that is in your power and within your reach.
My morning pages
I have always had a strong connection with writing. I believe that words have the power to bring out what is going on inside. Even if I sometimes run out of linguistic resources, the simple fact of taking a moment to write, to drain, to put it down on paper, makes all the difference.
In the morning I write three pages (I learnt this in the The Artist's Way). It is a ritual that has become non-negotiable. It is not about writing something poetic or seeking a greater purpose. The only objective is to clear my mind of the worries that occupy it and to give myself 30 minutes of presence before starting the day.
I know that those worries will still be there, but when I put them into words they are transformed: they lose weight, they stop taking up so much space. I'm not clear about the exact neuroscientific effect, but I do know that when I don't write, those ideas or worries are all the time pushing to be seen. As if they become bigger just because I didn't give them room to express themselves or to integrate them.
Naming them, moreover, changes the perspective: the dramatic is softened, and what seemed enormous becomes manageable. Writing is, for me, a reminder that almost nothing is as bad as the thoughts in my head make it out to be.
3 deep breaths at a key moment
It seems too simple, but it works. Whenever I feel myself speeding up, my head is full of noise or I'm about to react from anxiety, I take a minute to close my eyes and take three deep breaths. Just three.
I inhale through my nose, let the air down into my abdomen, and exhale a little longer than I inhaled. In that instant, something changes: the pulse slows, the mind becomes more orderly, and what seemed urgent loses intensity. It's like pressing a button on reset in the midst of chaos.
I don't need a mat, or a special space. I do it in the car, before a meeting, in line at the supermarket, before I go to sleep or before I get out of bed in the morning.
Three deep, conscious breaths... and the body remembers that I can inhabit the present more calmly. Like an immediate lifeline.
A mini conscious walk (without headphones)
Since I got Chipi, walking has become part of my daily routine. I had already practised walking meditation thanks to Thich Nhat Hanh - a precious mindfulness tool - but with him it is different. Walking in the desert or by the sea reminds me, almost forcibly, how captivating it can be to pay attention to the present.
I leave my mobile in my pocket, I don't use headphones, and I just walk. I listen to the sound of my footsteps, my breathing, the wind, the birds, the waves. Nature has this ability to turn down the volume of mental noise and bring me back to a simpler, more real state. It is a reminder that I don't need much to feel calm: sometimes it is enough to open my senses and walk for a while with full attention.
Unfold the mat
Yoga: my favourite tool.
Whether I practice for ten minutes or an hour, every time I unfold the mat I feel I enter a different space, a space that is mine alone. It is like a portable shelter that I can open anywhere, and it always brings me back to the body, to the breath and to the present.
Sometimes I arrive tired, with my head in knots or with no desire at all. But as soon as I start to move, the body settles, the mind quiets down and the feeling of home appears. That small gesture: putting the mat on the floor and being available... has become a ritual of care, calm and coming back to me.
These are my little reminders that the pause is now available, you just have to choose it.
Do you dare to discover your lifelines to cultivate the pause?
Thank you for reading, for making it this far.
Tami
